you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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