erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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