I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
