Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
