You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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