dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
