god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize