Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
thus making me awesome and them whores
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Randomize