Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
