You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
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