In the future we'll all be gay
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
It's Friday. Sex?
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
