I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
