i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
