YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
