She said her name was "party"
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
