I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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