wat bout pragnant strippers??
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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