what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
