Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
