Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Randomize
