it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
