i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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