I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
