ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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