I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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