Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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