it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Randomize
