Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Randomize
