And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
this hospital has no fireball
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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