ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
