I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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