Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(301): View more from Maryland

You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.

(240): View more from Maryland

Why does tequilla always make you text me?

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(919): View more from North Carolina

just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!

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(604): View more from British Columbia

Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.

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(914): View more from New York

still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.

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(289): View more from Ontario

Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.

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(817): View more from Texas

she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable

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(925): View more from California

Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?

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(303): View more from Colorado

I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.

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