yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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