dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize
