I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
