Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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