I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
