is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
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