By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Farmville is her only friend.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Randomize