I think my vagina is haunted
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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