and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Randomize
