Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize