It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize