She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Buhtt sex?
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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