Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
