I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
