"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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