? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
