What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
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