u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Randomize