Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
