Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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